A Story That Needs to be Told

I am going to be a part of a very special book project. And, I'd love for you to join me.

The book is called: Confessions of a Lesbian Pastor: sexuality, faith, and acceptance.
This is a collaboration of confessions from a closeted Pastor on faith, sexuality, fear, struggle, story, and acceptance.

We need your help in getting it started.

This book will be made available to kids in small towns, to kids who don’t know their story is important, to adults who are struggling with questions. This book will be a collection of confessions that were started on the blog: www.mysilenthalf.wordpress.com - confessions about struggle, sexuality, faith, questions, story, acceptance, coming out, and so much more. In addition to that there will be guest confessions from friends who Rae (a.k.a. mysilenthalf) has met along the way. (I am honored to be one of them!)

The goal is to raise $3,000. This money is going to be matched by an anonymous donor. The challenge: we have one week to raise the funds for the money to be matched. This money isn't for anyone to make a quick buck... instead it's so these books can be handed out to communities who need to hear our stories.

The money will be used to create, ship, and share the books with others across the country. The point of this book is to share stories and allow others to feel less alone, to put this book in the hands of people who need to know there are people who have lived the same questions, hurt the same hurts, and are standing next to them fighting the same fight.

Will you join us? http://www.indiegogo.com/mysilenthalfpublishing



Wishing you all the best,
Suzie Carr, novelist

A Question to Ponder

By Suzie Carr
@girl_novelist

A question to ponder: if you could give one thing that could make even a small difference, what would it be?

I tossed this question out to the masses last night and got several wonderful responses: A hug, the gift of being honest, time, and my favorite one – love and light.

When we give, we empower others, enrich lives, and spread joy. Giving takes on many forms. A gift of donating money to a worthy cause can be just as powerful as sharing a smile with someone who is having a bad day. The positive effect ripples and grows exponentially, spreading its roots deeper in areas that crave life, energy and the hope of a better day.

If we all gave a little something each day, the world, in its most basic spiritual sense, would be a better place. The spirit of giving is contagious. It magnifies a power that attracts more giving, thus completing a powerful circle. In giving, we open up to all sorts of positive vibes that have the power to touch countless people in ways we can’t even begin to describe. The gift of a smile can spread to thousands. The gift of sitting with an elderly patient can brighten spirits. The gift of blankets and kibble at an animal shelter can save countless of precious lives. The gift of a hug offers soulful nourishment.

When we give, we help others feel the beauty of peace, gratitude, and hope. Giving renews spirits, ours included. That, in and of itself, is a gift to the world. If we’re living in our best light, those around us benefit, too.

Speaking of giving, I can't forget to mention a beautiful blog I encountered yesterday that really encompasses the spirit of giving - www.sepisoul.com. Through her quotes, Sepi gifts us with inspiration, beauty, and food for thought on life's challenges. If you get a chance, I highly recommend checking out her site.

Here’s to shining our light onto the world!

Suzie Carr

I feel it's critical to support the community, and so I've committed to donate a portion of my book sale proceeds to the NOH8 Campaign (www.noh8campaign.com) and to Hearts United for Animals (www.hua.org) .

Check out my series of LGBT fiction.

The Power of a Mantra

by Suzie Carr

@girl_novelist

I work out most everyday, and most of these sessions are downright grueling. To get through them, I need to be present both physically and mentally. In fact, I think mental presence is more critical. I have those days when I trudge into my workouts with my head hung low, my mind in a fog, and my body refusing to push itself. 

Days like this, I dig deep into my mind and pull out my mantra, “I’m healthy and strong therefore I can do anything.” I repeat this mantra over and over again throughout the workout and to my surprise every time, it powers me with a strength that at times seems superhuman. 

Just for kicks, I tossed out a tweet asking others if they used a mantra to help them dig deeper and get them through their tough moments. I wanted to share some of these inspiring ones. I will be placing them in my reserve for those inevitable days when I will need one to give me that extra push to accomplish a workout, an assignment, a scene, or any of the hundred to-do items I usually tackle on any given day! 

Here they are:

• “Clear your mind, center your soul." 
• "Nothing is happening TO you. Things are just happening."
• "Be bold and mighty forces will come to your aid." Basil King 
• “I am whole, perfect, strong, powerful, loving, harmonious, happy, healthy, wealthy, and so thankful for all gifts my life.”
• "I am not afraid of tomorrow, because I have seen yesterday and I LOVE today!"
• “You will never get what you want as long as you’re jealous of what other people have.” 
• “If you cannot believe in yourself ... you cannot believe in anything”
• "Even if you cut off my arms, I will still create art.”
• “Forward momentum - something is better than nothing”
• “I'm learning and Listening Everyday Therefore I can keep hope.”
• "Thy Will be Done."
• ‎"Don't underestimate the importance of attempting the impossible and falling short of the mark; in so doing you prepare the ground, and earn the right, to attempt the impossible and succeed!"
• ‎"Remember to listen: you are always guided if you ask for help."

Do you use a mantra to get you through those tough moments? Feel free to share. Let's inspire each other! 

Wishing you ultimate success in all you do, 

Suzie 

I feel it's critical to support the community, and so I've committed to donate a portion of my book sale proceeds to the NOH8 Campaign (www.noh8campaign.com) and to Hearts United for Animals (www.hua.org) .

Check out my series of LGBT fiction.

The Secret to Real Progress

By Suzie Carr
@girl_novelist

We all have things we want to accomplish. We set out with great intention only to be sidetracked by our psyche urging us to turn the other way and enjoy the lure of things within easy reach instead. Maybe it’s that we want to be savvier with our money or get into better shape or gain more knowledge so we can prosper in our careers. These things all take time, focus, and drive. They require a significant amount of patience and motivation to acquire.

Short cuts just seem easier, don’t they? 

We’re all smart enough to know that to make any real progress, we must do the work. We can’t expect to run a company successfully without first acquiring the skill sets. We can’t expect to have a bestselling novel without first putting in the long hours of writing the book. We can’t expect to have healthy bodies without first treating our bodies with the respect of good nutrition and sensible exercise routines.

The reality then is that we need to work to get ahead on those things that we deem important.

As with any new venture, we set out on new goals fueled with what seems like a super human power. We might spend hours writing some fabulous scenes, reading a book on finance, or tackling the first week of a grueling exercise program. We feel on top of our game, fueled by euphoria from the first scene that took us on a glorious ride, from the first stock papertrade that went well, or from the first inch lost on our waistline.

Then, week two comes around and we find ourselves tempted to let the firm focus grip slide a little. Our old habits are staring us in the face begging for attention. To break an old habit, we need a sticking motivation something that will stand firm in the face of temptation.

A powerful motivator is usually an emotional one.

For instance, when it comes to my health, the drive is deeply rooted in a promise I made to myself after a great friend passed away 2 years ago. I will never again take my health for granted. He died of cancer too early in life and he would've given anything to have a healthy body. I have one, so I'm constantly reminded that I have to treat it with respect. It's almost like if I don't, then I'm disrespecting his battle. This is strong motivation for me tied inextricably to my emotions.

We’re all motivated differently. To find success, we must discover what makes us tick. If we don’t know yet what that thing is that’ll keep us strong in the face of adversity, we need to vigilantly keep searching for it.

Here’s one way: Reach out to others who are role models and doing what you want to be doing. Find out what keeps them focused and see if it mirrors your philosophies and touches you on an emotional level.

Never give up on your journey to discover the power that resides within you. It’s in all of us. 

Wishing you ultimate success in all you do,

Suzie Carr

I feel it's critical to support the community, and so I've committed to donate a portion of my book sale proceeds to the NOH8 Campaign (www.noh8campaign.com) and to Hearts United for Animals (www.hua.org) .

Check out my series of LGBT fiction.

A New Leash on Life

By Suzie Carr
@girl_novelist

I’ve spent the last six months planning, writing, and nurturing a new story I can’t wait to share with you all. I’ve approved the final proof of A New Leash on Life and am happy to report it is now available via Kindle and in the Kindle Lending Library on Amazon. Print version will be available next week.

This story is an important one for me to tell because it’s one that is close to my heart. As an avid animal advocate and lover, I feel it’s critical for human beings to protect the welfare of animals. They rely on us, trust us, and remain by our sides with loyal, unconditional love.

As with all of my books, I enjoy giving a portion of proceeds back to the #lgbt community. For this book, I will also be donating a portion to Hearts United for Animals.

Hearts United for Animals is a national no-kill animal shelter, sanctuary and animal welfare organization dedicated to the relief of suffering. They rescue dogs from all over the country and specialize in long distance adoptions. They take creatures who are lost, afraid, hungry or ill and comfort them, give them a warm, soft bed, good food, medical care and most of all, love.

HUA is a place of happiness, joy and love. Everything they do is in the best interest of the dogs. The dogs have big fields of grass and trees in which to run. Our primary interest is what will make them happy. HUA is a place to
celebrate the joy of life.

Thank you to all who support my work!
-Suzie


Here’s a summary of A New Leash on Life

When a hurricane blows through town and threatens the future of Olivia Clark's animal shelter, she publicizes her desperate plea for help to the masses. Aid comes from a surprising source: Chloe Homestead, Olivia's ex-girlfriend from thirteen years ago and the only girl Olivia has ever loved.

Chloe, a self-made millionaire, offers to finance and manage the shelter’s repairs and operations, a gesture Olivia is in no position to refuse. Working intimately together to provide loving care to homeless animals, Olivia struggles to keep her composure in Chloe’s fun and flirty presence. As Olivia's walls start to crumble, the past catches up to them. Chloe has a dark secret, a secret that she’s been carrying around for thirteen years.

Will Chloe's secret threaten the future of the shelter and the relationship she has worked so hard to restore?

A Contest - Shaking It Up

By Suzie Carr
@girl_novelist

A wonderful new twitter follower inspired me to host a book giveaway contest. Just like me, @smallville_nbd believes health and fitness is critical and would like to see more people enjoying the process of getting into shape so they can look and feel their best.

Here’s how to enter:

1. Follow me on Twitter (@girl_novelist)
2. Snap a picture of you exercising (walking, running, playing a sport, etc.) and attach it to a tweet
3. Included in this tweet, answer the question ‘why do you exercise’ in 140 characters
4. Mention me in the tweet (@girl_novelist)
5. Send to me by Monday, June 11 at midnight EST.

I will select the top 5 tweets that have inspired me the most and announce them in my blog. Those 5 winners will get a copy of one of my books—their choice— and in their choice of paperback or e-book.

Let’s inspire each other! Go snap some pictures… I’m waiting!

PS: @smallville_nbd is a very upbeat and positive person worth following!

Wishing you health and happiness!
Suzie


I feel it's critical to support the community, and so I've committed to donate a portion of my book sale proceeds to the NOH8 Campaign (www.noh8campaign.com).

Check out my series of LGBT fiction.

Here I enduring a grueling 5K Warrior Dash Race!

The Big Takeaway

Today is April 19th, and as I have done for the past two years, I will plant flowers in my front garden to honor my late friend, Patrick. I feel the best way to honor special people is to keep their memory alive by doing something life-fulfilling, life-evoking, life-enhancing. Whenever I’m in the presence of plants and flowers, I feel I’m in the presence of light, love, and God. So, it is through nature, that I keep my friend’s memory alive. As spring turns to summer and his flowers continue to bloom, I am reminded of his lively spirit.

With Patrick, I never knew what kind of craziness he’d toss in my path.  He treated life like it was an ongoing festival filled with clowns, balloons, candy apples, cotton candy, cold and crisp beer, sunny skies, and gigantic roller coasters.  He lived more life in his forty years than most eighty year olds did. If he wanted to travel, he traveled. If he wanted to run a business, he ran a business. If he wanted to get married and have a child, he got married and had a child. If he wanted to careen down a roller coaster with his hands up in the air, then he did so. If he wanted to sing karaoke to a restless crowd, then he sang his heart out. No wasn’t a part of his vocabulary. When he wanted something, he went after it with everything he had.

The big takeaway he left me with was to not take life so seriously. “It’s only life,” he’d say. “What’s the worst that could happen?” I keep trying to take on this spirit. I’m not quite there, yet. I still have reservations and hang-ups about frivolous things that are out of my control and really shouldn’t be allowed to weigh in on the grand scheme of my actions. Nonetheless, I keep trying to live my life each day to the fullest, reminding myself that for each breath I take, I’ve been given a gift.

I look for opportunities to live fuller, to express better, to give more freely. 

Has someone left an indelible mark on your life the way Patrick has on mine? Do you stop to reflect when you’re taking life too seriously, maybe even move past that mode and onto something more fruitful and energizing?

When I plant those flowers today, I will do so with the spirit of a child in awe so that each time I view them, I can harness that energy and live a slice of my day in Patrick’s sunny spirit.



Wishing you ultimate success in all that's important to you,
Suzie

I feel it's critical to support the community, and so I've committed to donate a portion of my book sale proceeds to the NOH8 Campaign (www.noh8campaign.com).

No? Ha! Watch me.

By Suzie Carr
@girl_novelist

When you love what you are doing, nothing in this universe will ever stop you from doing it. 
I dreamed of being a novelist since I was a senior in high school. Back then, I’d sit under the maple tree in my backyard on warm, sunny days and free write. I’d write in the car on road trips. I’d write in the waiting room of my dentist, doctor, or hairdresser. I’d write anywhere a pen and notepad was allowed.

Find what you love and do it.
I had to become a novelist. I couldn’t live any other life. This hunger has thrived in me for years. It’s seen me through the writing of a couple of novels that sat on my computer waiting to be read by someone other than me.

You are the determining factor in your destiny. No one else has that power.
With all major publishers in the lgbt genre closefisted from receiving unsolicited manuscripts from an unagented writer, my future as a novelist seemed pretty bleak by most standards. But, I refused to give up hope.

I kept writing anyway, refusing to allow a handful of people to get in my way and tell me no. I wouldn’t allow anyone to control my destiny like that. I loved creating fictional worlds too much to have ever allowed that to happen. I could feel this love, like a tickle deep down in my core. That was what I held onto.

Believing in your dreams pays off.
I didn’t know how I would ever get my books out there for readers to read, but I just knew it would happen. Just as the earth rotates, the tide pushes in and rushes back out, the sun rises and the sun sets, I too, knew, without a doubt, I would end up a novelist. I would work hard, learn my trade, learn from other’s succeeding in my trade, and never stop learning and refining.

Fast forward a few years into my hard work to the fall of 2010. I sat in the front row of an investment class. I listened to a successful investor educate us on the importance of resolve and the will to succeed. Then, he said something that made me feel like he was talking directly to me. He said one of his dreams was to write a book about investing. He did. He then bypassed all traditional publishers and opted for self-publishing. His words that still echo in my mind are, “Everyone should experience the process of writing a book. It’s truly cathartic.”

I went home that night with a beating heart that wouldn’t quit. I logged onto Amazon and discovered the path that would lead me to my destiny as a novelist.

It’s your life, your passion, your destiny.
I’m so glad I didn’t listen to the handful of people who thought they could dictate my future. No way will I ever give anyone that kind of power over my life, over my passion, over my destiny. I’m a novelist not out of luck, but out of hard work, out of a hunger to learn and refine, and most importantly, out of the love of it all.

Have faith in what you love.
Never let anyone tell you no. You have the power to say yes to anything that tickles your core, anything that gets your heart pumping, anything that you desire.

Wishing you much success,
Suzie Carr

I feel it's critical to support the community, and so I've committed to donate a portion of my book sale proceeds to the NOH8 Campaign (www.noh8campaign.com).

 

Unstuck

By: Suzie Carr
@girl_novelist

“I may not be there yet, but I’m closer than I was yesterday.”

This phrase hangs on my office wall and gets my attention several times a day. It keeps me on track and focused. It serves as a great reminder for me to stay the course, regardless of how slow-going, daunting, or challenging it may seem at times.

Whether you’re staring at a parcel of land and want to turn it into a lush garden, or you’re tasked with developing a new system for an organization, or you’re inspired to dress up a white wall with a life-size mural, you run the risk of derailing from the course if you view the process as one large looming runaway project.

What’s the solution? How do people deal with this? How does an architect turn a white piece of paper into a magnificent sketch? How does a movie director turn a bunch of words into a blockbuster film?

Well, if you break it down fact by fact, what you're really looking at is this --
A book containing 75,000 words can only start out one letter at a time. Connect enough of those letters and word counts will logically increase. It’s simple physics. String enough of those words into sentences and then into paragraphs, and before you know it, you will have created a scene, and ultimately a 75,000+ word book.

Logical, right? Of course, but, logic oftentimes takes a backseat when an overwhelming sea of white sprawls out in front of our eyes, challenging us to fill it up and transform it into a work of art that others will hopefully find worthwhile and inspiring. That’s a lot to shoulder. And, that’s where a lot of people get stuck.

How do you get unstuck?
Chop the process up into manageable chunks. Break it down letter by letter, flower by flower, brush stroke by brush stroke. You’ll get there eventually, as long as you show up and chop at the process a little each day.

Remember this as you start out on your next venture: Small chunks are far better than no chunks!
 
Wishing you ultimate success in all that's important to you,
Suzie

I feel it's critical to support the community, and so I've committed to donate a portion of my book sale proceeds to the NOH8 Campaign (www.noh8campaign.com).

The Power to Forgive

"It's not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters." – Epictetus 

By: @girl_novelist

I once held a grudge against someone for three months over something hurtful she said to me. I carried that grudge around like it was my suit of armor. It justified my bitterness. I’d go to sleep at night and allow this grudge to take up refuge in my dreams. I’d wake in the morning and further allow it to accompany me through the day and diminish my spirit.  To sum up this span of time – I wasted three good months of my life. 

Forgiving someone is hard. At that moment of giving in, you feel like you’re selling out. So, you hold tight to your ideals for the sake of standing your ground and you wait for that moment when vindication seeps in and makes you feel good again. 

I waited three months for this person to apologize for her hurtful words. The apology never arrived. Instead, I was left with nothing more than a dreaded feeling that I had lost a battle and she had won. 

Then one day I was having lunch with a good friend of mine, complaining about how much worse I felt towards this person still after three long months. My friend placed her fork down, then reached out for my fork and placed mine down, too.  She grabbed hold of my hands, stared me straight in the eye and begged me to let go.  “Be the better person and forgive her.”

The pressure of my three-month burden suddenly suffocated me.  I wanted to let go. 

The weight of carrying around this anger for so long had created such an imbalance, such a burden, such an emotional drain on my soul that suddenly I needed to shed it. I wanted to sleep a full night again. I wanted to wake up feeling light and happy. I wanted my peace back. 

I spent one whole week writing and rewriting an email to this person trying to find the right words to describe the pain she had caused me, and how I wanted to just move on and forget everything. These drafts grew to the size of a chapter, stretching out for thousands of words. Every new draft seemed to negate the very thing I was trying to do. I was telling her how wrong she was and how I was going to be the one to set it right.  She’d never read this and think, yeah, let’s hug now and be best of friends again.   

So, a week later, thousands of words into it, I decided on this instead: “I miss you and I love you.” 

I hit send and the weight of the world fell from my shoulders. 

I learned that sometimes the best way to show your strength is to be humble with it and come in like a gentle breeze. 

Wishing you lots of peace, 

Suzie 

I feel it's critical to support the community, and so I've committed to donate a portion of my book sale proceeds to Chely Wright's LikeMe foundation (http://likeme.org/) to help provide support, resources and education to LGBT individuals, and their families and friends.

A Personal Mission

I start my day at 3 a.m. 

I start out each day with a clear purpose, knowing exactly what I want to accomplish in that first critical, creative hour. I set out with coffee in hand and then plow into my determined project for that day. Once 4 a.m. strikes, I’ve made a tangible dent into one of my many life affirming projects.  Then, I relax into a fun romp through my social networking sites as a reward. 

The rest of my day follows suit. I tackle those projects that I deem most life affirming first, then drift for a few deserved minutes into surfing the net for fun. By the end of a week, I’ve accomplished my weekly goals. By the end of the month, I’ve accomplished my monthly goals. And by the end of a year, I’ve accomplished my yearly goals.  

This is strict to some, but it works for me. And, that is what is most important. Find what works and stick to it. 

For me, the only way to clearly reach my goals is if I know what they are and become intimately familiar with them. I do this by writing a personal mission statement at the start of every year. In it I detail what I’d like the end result to be. Then, I set out to create it.  

“"The best way to predict your future is to create it." - Stephen Covey

Many people stumble when it comes to writing a mission statement because to write one takes time and clarity. I found if I start with the end in mind, I am more successful in deciding exactly what it is I want out of life. You might find it helpful to imagine your 80th birthday celebration. What would you like to have accomplished in your life by that point? What would you like for people to say to you as they hug you and eat a slice of cake alongside of you? The answers you come up with are the things you should be focusing on in your present life. Write them down. Create action steps to achieving them by setting up daily, weekly, monthly, and yearly goals that point to their completion. 

It’s never too late to start living your dreams. Just don’t wait too long because life is speeding by every second of the day! 

Wishing you success along the way,

Suzie

I feel it's critical to support the community, and so I've committed to donate a portion of my book sale proceeds to Chely Wright's LikeMe foundation (http://likeme.org/) to help provide support, resources and education to LGBT individuals, and their families and friends. 

My Role Model

By Suzie Carr

@girl_novelist

This past weekend, I flew to my hometown and had the pleasure of visiting with my ninety-five year old grandfather. I took him for lunch at his favorite local restaurant where they serve up French Meat Pie and mashed potatoes. This treat delighted him, but not as much as when I asked him to tell me about some of his favorite things in life.

This question created a two hour conversation where my grandfather transformed from a feeble old man to a lively young man telling his tale and reliving those special moments in his life that brought him the most joy. He told me all sorts of interesting facts I never knew about him, and I didn’t know them because I never took the time to ask.

This man lived his whole life stockpiling tons of valuable knowledge and funny memories, the kind of stuff that could fill hundreds of pages of a memoir. His face lit up as he recounted his first sight of an airplane, his first drive in a car, and his first time watching television in color. He spoke fast and animated, anxious to tell me as much as possible in the time we spent together. He laughed and joked about his first date with my grandmother, about their wedding day, about the time his older brother took him fishing, and about the reason he goes by three different names (no one could pronounce is real name, Aurele, so they called him Johnny and Joseph instead).

My grandfather has always been my role model. He is the epitome of a great man, a loving man, a generous and humble man. He believes in hard work and perseverance. He believes in dreams and in laughter. He is genuine and tactful. And most of all, he is a forgiving man who has learned to move forward despite hardships that would crush most people I know. I aspire to live my life as happily and grateful as my grandfather.

My grandfather’s health is failing, but his spirit is not. I do feel blessed that I was given this special moment with him.

Before it’s too late, reach out to those special people in your life. Take them out for coffee and ask them about their life, their dreams, and their favorite memories. They are filled with stories and are just bubbling over with desire to tell them to someone who really wants to hear them.

Hoping you’re equally as blessed,

Suzie

I feel it's critical to support the community, and so I've committed to donate a portion of my book sale proceeds to Chely Wright's LikeMe foundation (http://likeme.org/) to help provide support, resources and education to LGBT individuals, and their families and friends.

The Journey

By Suzie Carr
@girl_novelist

I’ve been quiet on my blog for the past few weeks because I’ve been focused on completing my fourth novel – Inner Secrets. In early January, she’ll be ready to be unleashed onto the world! I’ve been writing this book since March, and have finally relinquished control over the keyboard to my editor (@editor_girl).

The journey has been fun, and as is always the case, has seen me through the twists and turns of everyday life. I always develop a sense of sadness when I complete a book. The characters attach themselves to me, and I find it hard to let go of them. But, I know to continue as a novelist, I must part my ways with them and start fresh meeting a whole new set of characters that’ll sweep me away from reality a few hours every day for the next six to eight months.

I am ready to take a new journey. So, it’s time to switch my mind into brainstorm mode and start on novel number five!

To give you a sense of Inner Secrets, here’s an excerpt from chapter one:

Dear Journal,

Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Hope Steele. I turned twenty-eight yesterday and I’ve got something to confess.

I am gay.

Just seeing these three words scrawled out on my page jolts me. I am charged tossing my truth out and seeing it stand on its own, strong, confident, fearless. I’ve told two people in my life to date, my best friend, PJ, and her girlfriend, Rachel. I’ve lived the better part of my life with this secret, and might just lose it if I have to live another moment hidden. So, here I am, confessing my truth on paper, hoping I can get to know the real me through this journaling.

So what’s the big deal that I’m gay?

Well, you see, I’m married. I’ve been married to my husband Ryan for two years, ten months, four days, ten hours and thirty-one minutes.

It's nice to be back blogging. Drop me a line and tell me what you think of this excerpt if you get a chance!

Wishing you lots of happiness,

Suzie


I feel it's critical to support the community, and so I've committed to donate a portion of my book sale proceeds to Chely Wright's LikeMe foundation (http://likeme.org/) to help provide support, resources and education to LGBT individuals, and their families and friends.

Beautiful Days Ahead

Recently a friend of mine ran into some adversity and she turned to me for guidance on how to move forward. I tried earnestly to say something to her that would spring joy back into her life, but was at a total loss for words. What do you say to someone who suffers a break in hope? “Don’t worry. It’ll get better with time?” Most of us have been in that place where we feel humiliated, overwhelmed, and hopeless all in one. This is not one of life's places we want anyone we care about to be.

As deflating as adversity can feel at the moment, I believe it puts us in a place that helps us grow into even better people. Without pain, without agony, without defeat, we have no frame of reference on which to judge greatness when it shines itself onto our life. I am a firm believer that defining moments, like the one my friend was going through, shape our lives just as the powerful storms and angry volcanoes of years past have shaped Earth. Without conflict, we'd have no Grand Canyon, no Mount Everest, no separate continents, and in respect to our singular lives, no respect for ordinary days when all is calm and right. And just as the storm clouds clear and open up to bright blue, sunny skies, so too will this shroud of regret for the past and fear of the future be lifted for my friend.  For everything is temporary.

Wishing all the best days for you,

Suzie

I feel it's critical to support the community, and so I've committed to donate a portion of my book sale proceeds to Chely Wright's LikeMe foundation (http://likeme.org/) to help provide support, resources and education to LGBT individuals, and their families and friends.

Words = Reality

Our Words Become Our Reality

By Suzie Carr
@girl_novelist

I’ve had friends and coworkers venting to me about their husbands, their wives, their sisters, their mothers, you name it, and the deeper into the trough of the complaint they get, the crazier their moods become. I can actually see their eyes start to pop, their cheeks start to redden, their bodies start to tighten like a balled up fist. What might’ve started out as a romp in conversation about a partner’s inability to put the remote control back on the end table each day, turns into a tirade about this partner never listening, never helping, never being home, etc. Wow how does this partner ever redeem herself?


The more we breathe life into a complaint, the bigger it grows. What a force!





It’s easy to complain to a friend about the pesky habits of your partner or the outlandish way another friend acted, and honestly, sometimes it just feels good to complain. Find a willing listener, and airing out the frustrated details of another person’s supposed angst against us tickles our inner comfort zone, strangely enough.


The problem with complaining is that it tends to perpetuate into a completely different animal altogether by sheer momentum. And, any good feeling derived is short-lived. Just like a creamy chocolate bar is delicious as it passes your lips and dances with your taste buds, so too is the lure of complaining. That yum factor loses its power pretty quickly. What’s left is that bitter taste of knowing you’re going to have to work extra hard to nullify its effects.


So, if our words become reality, imagine the possibilities of directing them from complaints to accolades? Imagine the things we could perpetuate in this lifetime if we harnessed this power?


Do you agree in this power of words?

Wishing you a great day,
Suzie

I feel it's critical to support the community, and so I've committed to donate a portion of my book sale proceeds to Chely Wright's LikeMe foundation (http://likeme.org/) to help provide support, resources and education to LGBT individuals, and their families and friends.

Beauty in the Raw

"For myself I am an optimist - it does not seem to be much use being anything else." Winston Churchill
By: Suzie Carr

@girl_novelist
Free spirits—you know the kind—the ones who walk with a skip in their step, a whistle from their lips, and a sparkle in their eye, who have the ability to brighten lives. They radiate joy and show a deep appreciation for life.

I am attracted to free spirits - completely drawn to them. I’m fortunate to have quite a few in my life.

Even in the midst of adversity, these people look at life with gratitude. They can harness the good from what others might view as worthless. They see a pile of work as a great way to accomplish something, a bad customer service situation as the ideal way to make someone happy, a challenging circumstance as one that can lift a person to higher ground.


They see the world in a brighter light and are not tarnished by its demands. My ninety-six-year-old grandfather is a free spirit. I’ve never heard him speak negatively about anything or anyone, and this man would be justified with the challenges that have attempted to break him down. I believe the secret to his contagious positive spirit lies in the way he chooses to view things.

Viewpoint is a powerful phenomenon. Something could be troubling or it could be beauty in the raw. It’s our choice. Take a dandelion flower. A landscaper who works hard to make her garden perfect may view it as a troublesome weed, while a person who looks out at cement everyday may see it as a beautiful flower. Or take a bag of bruised apples. Aren’t they really the perfect ingredient for a delicious homemade apple pie? My grandfather would say so.

A classic example of extracting the good out of the bad is with Jimmy Stewart’s character in the movie, “It’s a Wonderful Life”. What was once a drafty ole’ house became his life-affirming salvation and sought-after sanctuary. The job he had once viewed as a burden that was handed down to him became his saving grace and one of the many reasons for living. When he stepped back and viewed his situation as a blessing, he saw it for its value. He suddenly choose to see purpose in everything, even the broken staircase railing that earlier tore him up inside.

Imagine the power we could harness if we saw broken things as a pathway to change or a road to better things to come?

Do you know of someone like this? If so, how have they affected your viewpoint?



- Suzie Carr
I feel it's critical to support the community, and so I've committed to donate a portion of my book sale proceeds to Chely Wright's LikeMe foundation (http://likeme.org/) to help provide support, resources and education to LGBT individuals, and their families and friends.

Change

When you are through changing, you are through. ~Bruce Barton


By: Suzie Carr@girl_novelist
Change is something that can benefit all of us. It can bring us rewards, introduce us to new opportunity, and present us with beautiful new insights. A life rich with change is really like a healthy garden. Everything is budding, flowering, growing into spectacular new form.


Change is scary for most. It requires getting out of our comfort zone and walking an unfamiliar path that could bend or twist in ways we never thought imaginable. It’s only through this process, though, that we conjure up the momentum to get us places we’ve never seen before.

Sure, it’d be easier on our psyche and our nerves if everything just stayed the same, remained predictable. We’d know what each day would bring us. We’d be surefooted, confident that each step would lead to somewhere within our control, within our scope, within our patterns. We’d fall asleep every night unchanged, unweathered, pretty much the same exact person we were when we awoke that very morning.


If that sounds dull to you, further indulge with me for a moment and imagine what this world would look like if nature refused to shake things up every day. Picture a world where the clouds didn’t give way to sun, brown grass didn’t turn green, bulbs didn’t bloom into full-grown flowers, and bare tree branches didn’t sprout leaves.


Change renews the spirit, freeing us from all that is old and holding us back from our destiny. In moments of change and uncertainty, take pleasure in the unknown of the situation. Be reassured, the sun will shine, life-preserving raindrops will fall, seedlings will grow, and the flowers will bloom.


Change is beautiful. Its cultivating power nurtures our gardens within to grow into a colorful, ever-changing life.


Hoping you enjoy change as much as I do,


Suzie Carr


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I feel it's critical to support the community, and so I've committed to donate a portion of my book sale proceeds to Chely Wright's LikeMe foundation (http://likeme.org/) to help provide support, resources and education to LGBT individuals, and their families and friends.

Finding Fulfillment

"Successful people are always looking for opportunities to help others." - Brian Tracy



Finding Fulfillment
by Suzie Carr
@girl_novelist

My first job out of college was as a Senior Operations Associate working for a financial company in Massachusetts, where I eventually shed many frustrated tears.


You see, I wanted to be a creative writer, not to be a monetary wizard. Where others found gratification, I found a straight path to dissatisfaction.


Why did I settle for something so apparently astray from where I wanted to be? Money. I needed the green bills and this company gave them to me. I had a new, shiny, red car in the driveway and a lovely three bedroom apartment in the city of Providence. I succumbed to the lure of comfort, which resulted in many sleepless nights, wallowing in useless self-pity and drowning in relentless tears. The need for money was my obstacle. It forced me on a path which I didn’t want to be.


When I measured my dream against my reality the two were remotely off. The problem was that there were few positions available as a writer that did not require solid experience—something I did not have. There seemed to be no answer--no way to “break in.”


On a long hike one day, a friend turned to me and asked, “Isn’t a writer supposed to write?” Fueled by my laborious trek up the mountain and a biting need to defend myself, I answered quite hastily, “I don’t have time to waste on foolish dreams. How am I supposed to carve out time to write when I have to concentrate on cleaning, grocery shopping, and oh yeah, working?” Her patient reply was, “You shouldn’t feel guilty. Write to help others--not yourself.”


And so began my writing journey.


For many years, I volunteered writing articles for a local animal advocates group to help educate the public on issues pertaining to domesticated animals. Simultaneously, I began volunteering my time to write articles for hair salon trade magazines to help educate stylists around the globe on ways to market and build their businesses. Eventually, I discovered my real writing love  --novels that depict real life struggles and bring a sense of awareness that love is a beautiful thing!


I’ve learned that to stand for something requires action. If I want to be a writer, I must write. I can’t just talk about it. I must do it. And, I also need a definite purpose behind writing to experience the kind of fulfillment and purpose I crave. That definite purpose, of course, is to serve others.


And so continues my writing journey.


Hoping all the best for you,



Suzie


I feel it's critical to support the community, and so I've committed to donate a portion of my book sale proceeds to Chely Wright's LikeMe foundation (http://likeme.org//) to help provide support, resources and education to LGBT individuals, and their families and friends.


Follow me on Facebook to keep up on my latest projects! www.facebook.com/suziecarr.author